⭐☆☆☆☆ — I Was Told It Was A Wedding Gift
Verified Purchase · Pandora · Greece
Reviewed: Pithos — Large Storage Jar — One Owner — Contents: Everything
I did not purchase this item. It was given to me by the gods as a wedding gift with specific instructions not to open it.
In retrospect, a gift you are not allowed to open is not a gift. It is a problem someone else did not want to deal with.
The jar itself: Beautiful. Excellent craftsmanship. Very large. Unusually heavy for something that was described as a household item. I should have asked more questions about the weight.
The contents: Disease, death, sorrow, plague, misery, envy, famine, and several other things that did not have names yet and have since been named after the experience of meeting them. One star each.
The lid: Functional in one direction only as it turns out.
Ease of opening: Five stars unfortunately.
What I was told was inside: Nobody told me anything. That was the arrangement. Do not open it, Pandora. Why not, I asked. They did not answer that either. I have since developed strong opinions about informed consent as a concept and intend to raise them with Zeus directly.
Hope: Still in the jar. I closed it in time for that one. You are welcome. Nobody has thanked me for this. I find that somewhat unfair given the overall context of how the evening went.
Would I recommend: The jar is beautiful. Do not accept jars from gods. Do not accept anything from gods with conditions attached. Do not marry someone whose father is friends with gods who give conditional gifts. These are my recommendations. I have several more but this is a product review and not a memoir although I am considering the memoir.
One star. The craftsmanship was exceptional. I cannot stress enough that this does not matter.
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Comments:
@Epimetheus_Husband: I told her not to open it.
@Pandora: You absolutely did not tell me that.
@Epimetheus_Husband: I thought about telling you.
@Pandora: That is not the same thing.
@Zeus_Olympus: The gift was intentional. We stand by the gift.
@Pandora: I have questions.
@Zeus_Olympus: We do not take questions.
@Hermes_Delivery: Delivered as requested. Five stars for the delivery. What happened after delivery is outside my jurisdiction.
@Hope: Still here.
@Pandora: I know. I know you are.