AD READ — 60 SECONDS — TALENT: THANOS — PRODUCT: DELTA DENTAL
[Deliver with warmth and enthusiasm]
The universe is finite.
Its resources, exhausted.
And yet here you are. Scheduling cleanings twice a year. Requesting crowns. Filing claims for procedures that, if we are being honest with each other, are not strictly necessary for half the population.
I used to believe the solution required a gauntlet.
Then I discovered Delta Dental.
Delta Dental covers fifty percent of most major procedures. Fifty percent.
Not because they cannot cover more.
Because they have understood what I have always known.
Balance.
Half of your root canal. Covered. The other half is your reminder that nothing comes without cost. That comfort must be earned. That the universe does not owe you a fully reimbursed crown simply because your dentist recommended it.
This is not cruelty.
This is inevitability.
Delta Dental. Preventive care is covered at one hundred percent because healthy teeth serve the population efficiently and I respect efficiency.
But the moment you need something more?
Fifty percent.
As it should be.
As it always should have been.
[Thanos pauses. He is smiling. Nobody in the room is comfortable.]
Enroll today.
It is inevitable.
Use code SNAP at enrollment.
Removes 50% of your premium. Also 50% of your deductible. Also 50% of your waiting period. Thanos considers this generous. Your remaining teeth agree.