Tinder Profile: Lenina Huxley

· Sean Arenas ·

Lenina, 30s

Police Officer · Morality Enthusiast · Taco Bell Loyalist

Hi! I’m a San Angeles police officer who believes in safety, cleanliness, and following procedures that have been very carefully designed for everyone’s well-being.

I’m looking for someone kind, respectful, and open to learning. Ideally someone who appreciates structure, but I’m also… curious about less structured experiences (within reason, and probably with a guidebook).

Interests: Old media (so fascinating!), moral philosophy, dining at Taco Bell (award-winning!), asking questions, improving myself

Strengths: Optimistic, responsible, great listener, genuinely excited about new information

Weaknesses: Mild discomfort with bodily fluids, strong reactions to swearing, still processing the concept of “physical contact”

Wellness: Regular health monitoring. Very up to date.

Travel: Mostly within San Angeles, but very interested in historically significant locations that have been properly sanitized

Deal breaker: Uncontrolled aggression, reckless behavior, or saying the wrong thing when prompted

Ideal partner: Patient, informative, not overly fluid-producing, and willing to explain things without laughing (too much)

Pets: No, but I think they’re very cute in archival footage

“I’m really glad you’re here… I have so many questions.”

— Me

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